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The Slice

(Expletive deleted) Toddler Tuesday

Many years ago, one of my SR colleagues was on the phone with an events promoter who complained that it was difficult to book acts into what was then called The Met because it seemed as if there was always “some kids puppet show” using the downtown theater.

Only he didn't say it quite like that. The actual version included a common vulgar intensifier. I'm sure I don't have to spell it out for you. It went right between “some” and “kids.”

My colleague and I found the juxtaposition of rough language and the image of an innocent activity to be sort of funny.

Anyway, I went over to Riverfront Park this morning. I might have been a little early for public skating. In any event, I found a children's group at the Ice Palace and they didn't show any signs of wrapping it up. So I headed back to work.

As I got near City Hall, I encountered another Ice Palace regular. I reported what I had encountered. And she knowingly said “Toddler Tuesday.”

So on my way back to the Review Tower, I came up with a plan.

If anyone asked me if I skated, I would say “No, it was #*$%@*# Toddler Tuesday.”

As it happens, no one asked. Which might be just as well.

Sometimes people don't realize when I am attempting to be amusing.   

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About this blog

Features writer Paul Turner is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review in the Features department. He writes "The Slice" column, which appears six times a week and produces general features stories for the Today section.

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